When planning a wedding there will often be expectations from those around you. Some you may be very happy to go along with, but there may be others you feel are inappropriate or unreasonable. It’s important to examine your own expectations to reflect on whether these aspirations are really yours, or there just to satisfy others? Are you planning the wedding you want?
Is a small, intimate wedding really what you want, or are you just opposed to the lavish family wedding that your sister had last year? Do you really want a big meringue-type wedding dress or is this something that your mother wants you to have as she never had the opportunity to wear one herself? Is a formal morning suit really you or is it more for your father’s benefit rather than yours?
Planning a wedding is a time to think long and hard about what you actually want, and not the wants of others. Take care on this one; it is very easy to get caught up with other people’s dreams and aspirations, to the point where you mistakenly think they are your own.
- Think carefully about your expectations. Are they really yours or someone else’s?
- It is important not to get influenced by what others want.
- It is not always easy to identify where expectations come from, so talk to a close friend who will allow you time to talk, not someone who wants to listen to the sound of their own voice!
- If you find your wedding expectations are in fact coming from your mother, father, sister or friend, then a tactful conversation might be helpful so that everyone is perfectly clear about what you would really like.
It’s your wedding, and although you can incorporate certain requirements of close family into the proceedings, in the end you must have the final say.
Article by Carole Spiers, Love and Relationship Expert
Image from Flickr by martinak15 (CC BY 2.0 License)